Adventure calls to me, and I am constantly answering no matter where I may be. It fills my life with meaning and happiness so pure; I’ve never quite found anything else like it. The laughter fills the air around me, generating a high level of energy infectious to anyone that crosses its path.
This trip that I have been on now for over 5 weeks has open my eyes to so many new things allowing me to give my whole heart in everything I do. There is this new sense of freedom that is unlike anything I have ever grasped.
Solo travel allows for that on an amazing level. Being able to say yes to strangers that present a fun idea, with no excuse to say otherwise. Connecting with the people in surrounding as well as Mother Earth herself. Speaking to the mountains, the trees and yes even giving a fair try with the animals too. Confidently I can say, these people I have interacted with, forming deep friendships with, creating amazing stories and memories, just like the stories themselves, I will hold them all near and dear to my heart forever.
Love is a funny thing. It’s something that we put a title on, definition of, and sometimes even limitations. Love is eternal, never ending and can be shared through everyone you come into contact with if you allow for it. But its hard. It’s hard to open yourself up in all different situations. It’s hard to show people your true side because this is when you are most vulnerable to get hurt. It allows for real judgment of character, how others really view you and how you allow this to effect your being.
A goal of mine this trip is to love unconditionally. Love the people around me, love the decisions I make even if I think they are wrong or could have been more thought out, love myself for everything I am going through, knowing I am strong and confident in this trip.
The truth of the matter is, I am so happy. The happiest I have been in a long time. Don’t’ get me wrong, my life in San Diego was amazing, surrounded by great people, loving family, and a job I was pretty stoked to go to every day (and I would spend the majority of my day there even while off the clock). Something had been missing for a while, those weekend adventures stopped making the cut for what I needed to fulfill my adventure odometer. Although I was growing in so many ways, I felt I had hit a wall, with no way to go up or around it.
Change was needed. So change is what I did.
I’m nervous about what is ahead of me. I don’t know what to really expect when I am up in Alaska. The friends I will be making, coworkers I’ll be working with on the daily, hell I don’t even know where I’m going to be going grocery shopping. But fear of the unknown is something that is uncontrollable. It’s a good thing to have because fear means that you’re thinking things through, planning or well trying to plan to the best capability you can.
When you have fear, you’re pushing yourself in ways that make you uncomfortable allowing for things to change. Change can be an amazing thing if you open yourself up for it. It can allow for growth in ways no one can predict, connections between different people of different walks of life, a deeper understanding of oneself and the being in surrounding.
I’m in Canada now, Squamish to be exact. When my friend and I were talking last night, I asked her what her favorite destination has been, seeing as she too has traveled all around the world. Australia, she says, having spent the better part of 3 months when she was 21 and even going back for a 3-week trip a few years after her initial trip down under. When she returned the question, I smiled and said here. I’m not joking when I say I left my heart here 4 years ago upon my first arrival to this amazing land. There is something that has continually called me back and makes my heart beat louder and faster than ever before.
I’m sad that I have to start work so soon and can’t stay here longer, but weather also hasn’t been on my side for this last section of my trip to allow for more adventures in my holy land. That’s ok, because I wouldn’t trade any of my experiences for anything else this world could give me. Squamish will always be here, and so will my heart. So I will always know where to come looking, when it’s time to find it again.
*Photo from climbing in Smith Rock last week in the Lower Gorge, courtesy of Man Joe