Since I arrived in Alaska, I haven't written much to keep you updated with how things are going. It's not due to the lack of adventure, not having good service, or even time (because we can always make time for the things that are truly important to us). I guess one could say it's the lack of inspiration to turn my brain on to story telling mode. The constant go go mentality and basic levels of communication you have when you cycle through new clients, having the same conversations from one day to the next. Working some days up to 12 hours to come back 'home' as if it never ended. That's just how it works when you eat sleep and breathe with the same people, in such a small town with no where to escape to.
Life up here is different than I ever could have imagined. Coming off of a 6 week road trip going straight into work, I guess I didn't expect how big of a change that would be. Although I feel like I made a pretty smooth transition, I'm realizing how drastic my day to day life was altered.
Ive been working on keeping up with plenty of adventure, and can feel when I've been slacking in that department of life. Hiking up into the alpine air, escaping the helicopter buzz and noise of busses transporting tourist off the variety of cruise ships to their designated tours. The lifestyle here is something I didn't quite understand when I pictured living in Skagway. The mentality of the people trying to simply run businesses based around money, because, well, that's how businesses keep going. I get it, or at least I'm trying to understand, learning to understand another perspective to a lifestyle that is different than my own.
When I was offered a guiding job, I jumped at the opportunity to be a part of the outdoor guiding community, to learn new skills, getting my first taste of what this career path could entail. I've learned so much, about the community of outdoor spirits, new tricks for my trade, and more so what I want to do in my life. I didn't expect this type of self growth, understanding just how important time to myself is, what living in such a huge communal space would be like, with ways I have to live to stay sane while other ways I simply cannot live with. I've found directions I can head in, feeling as if there as so many different paths, some crossing ways with others, making decisions seem so straight forward even with all the meandering about.
My adventures consist primarily of hiking, which has been awesome to gain different perspectives of the mountains but I long for my days spent climbing vertical walls that allowed to push my physical, mental and emotional boundaries all at once. There is quite a bit of rock up here but it needs the time and devotion to be cleaned up, developed, scoped out and made accessible for those interested to give it a whirl, and with work, I simply don't have the time needed to devote to such a project.
Looking back on the past few months, still with two more to go before the end of the season, I have completed and achieved all of the goals I set out for myself since I have arrived in Alaska. It feels awesome but at the same time I feel as if I have underestimated myself in my abilities and have yet to push myself in the necessary direction to achieve bigger dreams.
With that being said, I am putting Skagway on hold for a week to do my first big personal trip of the season. Flying over what seems like hundreds of different glaciers and mountain ranges I know I am getting closer to my destination of Denali. This is the adventure I've been seeking and why I feel as if a part of me has been missing. When I got on the ferry last night hugging goodbye to my good friend Sarah, I could feel a weight lifted off my shoulders. Everything has worked out perfectly for this trip and I couldn't be more grateful to have had such amazing support from the best of friends I have met while living in this profound state. I will be meeting two friends and going on some type of backpacking adventure through the park and I'll be sure to post some photos and tell my stories when I have some to share.
Last night I was so nervous, scared due to the change in what was to come. Although today I feel that same energy, my mind has settled from the over abundance of thoughts and clutter allowing for the excitement to radiate through. For these emotions are the exact same feeling, it's just how ones mind wants to perceive it.